I was nearly dumped by my girlfriend on Sunday night for uttering four words in our living room, and I may lose a few friends and readers for repeating it, but here goes nothing.
“Shark Week” is overrated.
If you’ve been living under a rock for a decade and have never seen “Step Brothers,” Shark Week is a pretty big deal to some people. A week-long celebration of our aquatic enemies, the Discovery Channel profits from this cult following for seven days a year.
And each year, I turn it on for about 10 minutes, nod my head and think to myself, “That’s nice.” Then, I turn it off.
It’s not that I don’t respect these beasts of the deep. I understand our fascination with sharks — they’re incredible killing machines, and their track record has us horrified to swim within a mile of them.
The Discovery Channel didn’t do itself any favors on Sunday night, when I tuned in to catch a few minutes of their two-hour documentary, “Megalodon,” to gauge my level of interest in this year’s Shark Week material.
(OK, I was “asked” to turn it on for a few minutes by said ladyfriend.)
Megalodon is the tale of a massive shark that carries a Lochness Monster-like tale. It’s a massive shark that has been known, according to legend, to tear apart massive whales in a single bite and even take down boats.
But it wasn’t even a real documentary — it turned out to be fiction.
— Chris Helock (@ChrisHelock) August 5, 2013
— Melanie (@MelaniewithnoY) August 5, 2013
Annnnnnnnnd after two hours I still don't know if this stupid Megalodon exists. #Upset 😒
— Caitlin Noland (@MissRae_07) August 5, 2013
So now, they can’t even show real-life sharks during Shark Week? That’s what they go with?